I woke up yesterday with a pinched nerve in my neck. I have never had that happen before.  (I feel empathy for those of you who experience this type of discomfort on a regular basis.)  It was painful and a bit awkward to move throughout my day.  My body was out of alignment and my attitude sure needed some adjusting as well.  My right shoulder was hanging lower than my left and my feelings about life were drooping down too.  As I reflected on this a bit, God seemed to whisper to me that this is symbolic of how the vast majority of people around me—-actually, probably people all over the world—  feel right now.  It is a season where everyone is experiencing some literal or figurative “out of alignment” issues with their body; their family; their church family; their jobs; their creative passions; their budgets; their convictions; their priorities; their eating habits; their social media time; and so much more.

It seems like each month something new,  bizarre, life-altering, and/ or uncomfortable is brought to the surface in our world.  The tension level is thick, the media presence is swarming our social media feeds with tough images to face, and the BIG feelings are coming out everywhere.

Dramatic changes, detours, and distancing require strength to look inside ourselves; come to our Savior; heal our wounds;  and seek lasting transformation.

It’s a process of unmaking. It’s a process of tearing things down before they can be built up again.  It’s not easy, but the results are oh, so good.  We can’t enter this process of unmaking alone.  The journey requires a strong back; a tender but resilient heart, and a motivational partner–God.  He will do the heavy lifting if we invite Him into this process.  He wants to carry us through it.  He is standing at the door of our hearts waiting for us to open it.  Amen, for this.

My quarantine playlist has been composed of many inspirational songs, including the following: “Shelter in Place” by our pastor Alan Frow & his daughter Sophie; “New Normal” & “His Hands” by JJ Heller; “Red Sea Road” by Ellie Holcomb; Hamilton soundtrack; The Greatest Showman soundtrack;” Everywhere I Go” by Tim Timmons (my go to feel good, dance party in the living room & kitchen song); “High Hopes” by Panic!At the Disco; “Try Everything” & “Waka Waka (This Time for Africa)”  by Shakira —-the last handful are on my running playlist when I’m not listening to podcasts; and perhaps my most listened to song “The Unmaking” by Nicole Nordeman.  There is something about this song that has really spoken to my heart and resonated with me over the past 6 months.  Here are some of the lyrics:

“This is where the walls gave way. This is demolition day.

All the debris and all this dust– what is left of what was once ;

 Sorting through what goes and what should stay…”

Chorus:

“This is the unmaking—beauty & the breaking.

Had to lose myself to find out who you are .

Before each beginning there must be an ending.

Sitting in the rubble, I can see the stars

This is the unmaking.”

I feel like I have been sitting on a pile of rubble for many months. And, if I’m honest, I have probably been sitting on this pile for a long time prior to our COVID-19 season—like for years.  This season of social isolation has just made my  debris more apparent to me.  And, during this season, it’s hard to get motivated to do anything about that heap of heavy scars; heartache; harmful habits; and half-healed wounds.

But, this song is hopeful for me. This song reminds me that there is beauty in the ashes.  That there is a God who helps us during the process of unmaking & unlearning of the things in our lives that need to be torn down and rebuilt.  He’s waiting to start this process with us.  He delights in these transformations and not yet finished projects.  He is all in and wants to be a part of it.  He is sitting on that pile of rubble with us and longing for us to breath out “Speak to me Lord, I am listening”.

There on the hill of heartache and heaviness, he is taking our hand and stretching our arm and fingers toward a sky full of his glorious, sparkling creation saying “Look, I have created this for you. Let me help you to see this beauty more clearly.  Let’s start this process of unmaking & recreating”

He is there to rescue us in our time of need; to be our hero & our helper; to make us see the stars & the sea in spectacular wonder; and to create something new in our lives that have been beautifully unmade.